LARPing is a social event. I know! Can you believe it? Being a social event there tends to be some social interaction between people. Usually awkward, not looking in each other’s eyes, shifting your weight from feet to feet, and you can’t remember what you talked about after you walk away. Did I even introduce myself? What class is she?

Yup, that about covers a conversation between two people that are use to interacting with a screen between themselves and humanity. But you are subjecting yourself to actual social event outside of your basement so that alone is something to be proud of.

Most players when they think about the stress of carrying on a conversation do not even think of forming a relationship with someone unless they can call to trade Magic cards. Furthest from their mind is starting a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship.

And yet when guys gather around to plan an outing to the local LARP just the mention of lady LARPers have them cheering each other on, slapping each others back and drawing up intensive plans of who is wingman. But they are usually the first ones to mumble a hello and hightail it out of there to the first girl LARPer they come in contact with.

There are many girls out there that have the same reaction! We plan on meeting a lot of guys but it becomes overwhelming when we finally arrive to the camp. If you don’t have the confidence of a movie star the reactions you receive are intimidating enough to send anyone running for cover. And if you have the confidence to actually receive and handle the attention accordingly you become ‘untouchable’ by the guys who are nervous around confident girls and the stuck up princess to the rest.

And yet with all these factors playing against us finding a significant other during LARPing is not as hard as you think. Girls, we have it much easier since the odds are usually in our favor and yet boys… there is no reason why you can’t stand out and catch the eye of that cutie over by the lake.

It is no different then trying to hook up with someone that you see at the mall or at the beach… LARPing just has you stuck together for a whole weekend, in close quarters, wearing sexy costumes, and in a romantic atmosphere. I bet you really never thought about it like that, did you?

The major set back is… hygiene. Most guys, and now an increasing number of girls, really don’t care how they smell or look after a weekend in the woods kicking some goblin butt. Now, for some guys and girls that is just fine. (Except the smelly part…) That is why they go LARPing, to get it all out and scream like an animal for an entire weekend.

Then there are guys and girls wondering why they just can’t find a date in the only social environment they experience all month. Would you go to the club smelling of body odor, greasy hair and muddy pants? No. You would take hours to look your absolute best. I didn’t forget that you’re LARPing, you’re going to get dirty and sweat but that can be controlled. Make sure to take a shower right before you head to the LARP and dress your best for check-in and anything else going on before lay-on. Think of this as you ’going to the club’. You’ll make some awesome first impressions and feel confident when meeting new people.

As the weekend progresses try to enjoy more time sitting around in the Inn role-playing instead of fighting, this gives you another chance to actually sit down with your crush and talk. Scout out some showers and use them! Baby wipes help along with a wash cloth and bar of soap.
 

I’ve personally washed my hair under a running water pump/faucet many times. I’ve even used the melted ice out of the cooler to wet a wash cloth and scrub my arms, legs, neck, etc. You should be packing a bag specifically for hygiene. This is a social event after all as I mentioned above. And the normal social standards should be met even though you are being the farthest thing from normal this weekend.

So if you find yourself heading home each month without getting the number of that handsome barbarian or sexy pixie take a look of yourself in the mirror and see if a little washing up just might increase your chances of scoring a date with them. And please, keep in mind… drowning yourself with a bottle of Axe or perfume is just as stomach turning as catching a whiff of BO.

Once you have your LARP funk under control… let’s revisit the topic of interacting. Human beings are attracted to confidence. We respect it and are jealous of it if we cannot pull it off ourselves. One thing I should mention is you don’t need to be confident to give an air of confidence. It’s a mask that is pulled into place to cover your emotional turmoil underneath. You don’t believe that when a police officer is working in a hostage situation that he isn’t nervous and sweating every word? Of course he is. We’re all humans after all.

It’s just up to each human being how they will have other people perceive them. When meeting anyone new at a LARP, especially a crush, you need to pull that mask into place and breath. When beginning a conversation ask for a name and use it often. Not only will the conversation seem more intimate but it will also help you remember someone’s name. In LARPing it is especially hard to remember names since everyone has two for the weekend and everyone understands this. Do not hesitate to ask for their name again instead of not calling them anything, or worse, the wrong name. Plus, it shows you care. Once the names are covered keep the conversation:

• clean
• quick
• heartfelt

I don’t care if you’re talking about a piece of meat. Follow those three guidelines and you should be fine. This works for both out of character and in character interaction. Work at keeping your voice clean and quick. No one likes people who mumble, stumble and pause to collect their thoughts. You should not even initiate conversation if you are not comfortable with the subject you are about to present to your target. Yet do not hesitate to ask questions. Do not let your pride get in the way and do not try to show off.

Having your voice heartfelt is the cherry on top. Smile and compliment the other person but do not become so sticky sweet about everything that the other person becomes uncomfortable. Show emotion and don’t hesitate to speak your mind. If they mention something that would require a sad or happy reply, do it with heart. Do not be fake. Along with speech, body language is a huge sign of confidence. You cannot deny it. Everyone has seen someone walk into the room and everyone just notices them. It may be for a split second but they notice them… for their confident attitude. Keep your body language:

• clean
• quick
• heartfelt

Yes, the same guidelines as when you talk to some one. Don’t hesitate to approach someone, be quick and yet not overbearing. Keep your moments clean. Don’t shift your weight around or move your hands around unless to ‘talk’ with them. Keep your hands away from your face and do not cross them over your chest in a protective gesture.

And finally, face towards whoever you are talking to and glance into their eyes. It’s intimidating and you’re opening yourself up. Your eyes are after all the window to your soul. When I mean glance, I mean just that. Do not stare at the floor, her chest or at everything else but their face. And do not stare nonstop into someone’s eyes or you are going to feel silly and make them uncomfortable.

All of these tips can be used for both you and your character when it is asked of you to interact with another human being. Act, sound and smell confident and you’ll be catching people’s attention before you know it.

And by people I mean that priest over there that keeps glancing your way.